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The idea to write this article came to me in connection with specific case studies. I was approached by a young woman Katya, who complained of depression, constant fatigue, tearfulness for any reason, and often without occasion. ‘I have a loving husband, two small children whom I love very much, but for some time, I seemed to have lost with them an emotional connection. For no reason, no reason at all annoying, shouting at them. I left the profession, which was very successful.

She was a Professional Actress. Success was a long time. But one day, finding themselves at the height of his fame, she was frightened, I do not know why, what for this success may come in the form of public atonement – the disease I or my family. I unexpectedly dropped around the scene. And now I feel lost, unnecessary. I live as though when – it may be a child, was instructed: do not be meaningful, not to succeed, not to be is not to be normal, do not belong ‘How do I get out of this? What is happening to me? ” As it turned out in the process of psychotherapy, the picture of life (as indeed, the lives of most people), influenced by the so-called parenting orders.

They are essential for human life. R. and M. Guldingi treat parents as prescription messages transmitted by parents because of their (parents) own problems: anger, fear, confusion, unhappiness, anxiety, failure, etc. In his book ‘Healing the new solution’ M. and R. Guldingi give a list of basic parenting orders and taken on the basis of their children’s decisions. Injunction ‘do not do’ usually give your child jerking fear parents, who forbid him the usual things: climb, crawl, run, etc., infecting his self-doubt. As an adult man with such a prescription can not take their own decisions. Injunction ‘do not be’ – one of the worst, because in the future may produce in a person prone to self-effacement one way or another. It often sounds like this: ‘If it was not you, I would have long ago moved away from your father ‘,’ If you were not there, I would be easier to live and not be pulling the strap ‘,’ You’re so hard to be born, that I have since sick ‘, etc. etc. Injunction ‘do not be a significant’ often arises when, tugging children, parents say: ‘Children should be quiet and discreet. ” Prescription of ‘not Bring’ gives parents often during games. When the answer to win a child, they are offended, they break contact, as if telling: ‘do not be winning, and not ‘ Injunction ‘do not be a’ often give the child ‘not the’ gender (eg, waiting for a boy and a girl), to satisfy their unfulfilled expectations begin to clothe and educate this girl as a boy. Prescription of ‘not whether normal ‘and’ do not be healthy ‘get the children taken care of or love only when they are very sick. Psychosomatic symptoms. If a person is not being assisted to overcome stressful situations, is gradually emerging, so-called psychosomatic. Psychopathy. Psychopathy itself terapevtichno and entails a positive change in many patients.

What to give your child a birthday? Toy? Book? New clothes? But all that he bought and on ordinary days what to do to remember your birthday child and his friends? Give your child a holiday! Of course, this does not simple. But we will be happy to help! Make the holiday a success be forewarned guests (no later than 1 week) Arrange for gifts. To make your guests do not wrestle, but you do not get unpleasant "surprises" better to negotiate with the parents of children invited, it would be better to give (and vice versa) Consider the scenario. Children's festival consists of: a) meeting the guests and giving presents b) bright greeting show-program) holiday table d) independent games kids g) leads guests guests spectacular greeting, photo session and the table are the four integral element of the holiday. That's one show in honor of the birthday child and make a holiday truly striking and important – individual. The duration of the show program depends on age: at an early age (1-3 years) – less than half an hour for the younger preschool children (3-5 years) from half an hour to an hour for the senior preschool age children (5-7 years) 1-2 hours Depending on the organization of children's Holiday Children's Table is significantly different from an adult. If the adults at the table to spend most of the time and a lot of eating, filling meal break in the conversation, the children's cooking beguiling little delights. .

Love is given not for everyone. Someone endowed with love, and someone she bypassed. Why is this happening? The ability to love depends on the mother, that is laid with the birth of a child. Mom is nursing her child, stroking gently, looking love talking to him. The kid feels that peace, that is my mother loves him, then there arises love to the world.

And this child will be happier and talent in love. Of course there will still layering on the character rights. Decor, relationships with peers, experience friendship or lack of it. If the mother of the child to cry does not run to him, once again not to take him in my arms, or kiss it up to you, the child of love in relationships with other people will be cold, aloof. Yesterday a child becomes a loving, respected be respectful, is often rejected by the suffering of love cynic. We learn how to: read, write, cook, and learn to love – such a task before him and do not set. It would be someone to love, and then no problems. But it turns out, the ability to love involves a great deal.

One love is a desire to grow spiritually and physically, to give strength for life, another love is yearning, desperation forces him go. After all, love – it must be prepared to take risks. You fall in love, and partner threw you and it's very painful. But life goes on and we must once again live with a raised head and open heart. Love requires us to openness, but it's also a risk. You open the heart to your partner, you have the assurance that your honesty is not never turn against you. Falling in love, you give your life, your happiness in the hands of another. You begin to envy of his mood, decision-making. How often do we agree on the relationship? Can you love and remain master of his life, his happiness, that's what even matter? There are dangers of love: fallen out of love, in love with the wrong, not love. This risk leads to suffering. Are you ready to cope with them. There is love – I want you to be happy, I want to get what I want. And there is love – I want to give you what you make happy. Look there difference? Love – is respect for the beloved, tolerance, respect for his hobbies (fishing, theater, etc.), taking care of him. And all this from the heart. To live fully and be happy to learn to manage their feelings, if necessary push them, stimulate, and if necessary a mute, ban. It's not just sovladet their feelings, but in reality, and each person, if he is a man capable of it.